Thursday, December 10, 2009

#78 Oh Hell, Why Bother

I was talking to a friend the other day about our bodies, diets, our relationship with food, and why we do what we do. She said that she had been really happy with her eating for the past 3 weeks, but her happy place with food and eating went to the dogs after a visit with an old friend from high school. Her friend happens to be tiny. She has always been tiny. This is nothing new to my friend. My friend is a full-figured girl and will never be considered petite no matter how much weight she loses.

As I listened to her share her fall-off-the-wagon story, I realized exactly what was going on. She was going through the Why Bother Blues; that negative feeling of "look at all I've done and it still isn't enough". It's that why bother feeling, and I'll be honest here, it has pulled me into the doldrums many times when it comes to my calves and legs. No matter how much yoga, power walking, squats, weight lifting, and dieting I do, my calves will never be and have never been shapely, and truthfully, my derriere will always have a little more jiggle when I wiggle than I would like it too.

My father calls this [the calf and ankle part of the leg] the Lederer curse. My mother's mother had these legs, and my mother and 2 of her sisters have/had these legs, and now, I do too. Interestingly, I don't think any of the female cousins inherited this trait. Obviously their fathers held the dominant gene for leg shape.

I told my friend that I totally got what she was saying. We both agreed that we can't compare ourselves to others, but have to look at our bodies and see what they are capable of. This doesn't make the "why bother" feelings go away, it just sort of brings you back to what's possible and real - like a reality check. Of course, growing old and all that goes with this doesn't help matters, but if I've learned anything, it's that you can make changes to yourself at any age.

So, I guess the lesson here is that no matter how many times you've had the why bother blues, you can't give up. Call me dumb or dense, but I'm going to keep working on these legs and this body until the fat lady sings, and may that fat lady never be me again.

You know, hope springs eternal.... even at 47.

Quote of the Day: "Creative Minds are Seldom Tidy" - Author unknown


Alix said...

You are so right.

We've all had the why bother blues. Sometimes it all seems so pointless. Especially as we get older... it's like I'm not going to be entering any Miss America Pageants at fifty, so I might as well eat this cake.

But we are given only so many days on this earth and we need to enrich them as much as we can. If that means accepting yourself as you are or committing to change the things you don't like... well... it's a personal choice. But to be miserable, caught in the purgatory of the middle and feeling helpless to do anything about it - that's the true tragedy. Be one way or be the other - but be happy.

Jeanie said...

I am a "good bit" older than you and I'm here to say that if I put in the effort the body still responds. I do think the "why bother" mentality becomes harder to overcome with age. I admire your "don't give up" attitude.

Chris H said...

Nice post mate. I agree, ya have to work with what your genes gave you!