#66 Body Protuberances

While perusing the Internet for my daily dose of news the other day, an article's title caught my attention. It said, "Young Designer Uses 'Normal-Sized' Models at London Fashion Week - Casting Director and Stylist Walk Out". It seems that this young Canadian designer, Marc Fast, mixed in normal sized models [US sizes 8-10] with his toothpick strutters against the wishes of the casting director and stylist. When asked why he did this, he explained that he was trying to show that his form-fitting knit wear looks good not only on the slim and slender, but can also be worn by the "everyday" gal.

Well, Marc honey, I am that everyday gal. I wear a size [US] 6 or 8 depending on the designer and the style, and I can tell you, Sweetie, that when it comes to clingy knitwear, the "normal" body with its curves and protuberances just doesn't look as good as the slim and bulge-less. I'm not talking skeletal, as in [US] negative zero, nor am I saying that we [the collective we] look bad. I'm just saying that we don't look "as good", like we forgot to put on our full-body spanks or something.

What can I say? It's just my opinion. When I look in magazines and see plus size or normal size females modeling dresses, slacks, skirts and jeans, I honestly don't like the outfit as much as when I see a "model" wearing them. And, the answer is so simple: Fantasy!! Along with a little Desire and Hope thrown in. I want to believe that when I put on those slacks, silk blouse, suede boots, and chunky funky belt, that I will look [exactly] like Jessica Alba or Cindy Crawford or Halle Berry. I mean for crying out loud, I have brown hair and brown eyes too, ya know!

Which brings me to my next rant. I love reading medical studies. Especially the ones now reporting that a little extra fat is not such a bad thing. For example, in August, the Canadian Obesity Journal reported that a little extra weight can protect one against mortality, and that being too thin may be associated with a higher risk of death. Hmmm. Haven't we also read that people who reduce their calories to the point of starvation [while getting all their needed vitamins and nutrients of course] have a better chance of longevity, and with fewer instances of disease?

Are we confused? Baffled? Well, sure we are. How about a little red wine? Nope. Some studies believe that 'a glass a day keeps the doctor at bay' is false, and that no alcohol is best. How about some caffeine. Nope. This too is under question. It seems that one cup of Joe is just one too many, and I read a BLOG a few weeks ago that reminded me of the "no fat" diet craze that was later proven to be way off base. These studies that make our brains ping pong back and forth make me nuts. Nu?

What I've decided is that moderation has to be the answer. Too much, or too little for that matter, are just not specific enough. I'm waiting for the study that says, 3 scoops of ice cream are better for you than 2 scoops because after 3 scoops you are full and satisfied, but after 2 scoops, "studies show" that the average person is still unsatisfied -- which may lead them back to the freezer for additional scoopage. Best to play it safe with 3 scoops... don't you think?

Quote of the Day: "There's no telling how many miles you will have to run while chasing a dream" -Author unknown

#65 Candy Corn - How I Love Thee

Note to Reader: This babble was posted last year around Halloween. Nothing has changed....it's September 20th and I've already gotten into the candy corn.

Every year around this time I do something terrible. I buy candy corn. I know you're thinking how terrible can that be? Well, I just don't buy candy corn, I crave it. And once I start eating it, it's very hard to stop. Sometimes, before I even know it, I've popped 10 sweet kernels into my mouth, and as the 11th goes in, I begin to get the shakes and feel nauseous. It's usually when I'm feeling this way that I question my sanity [Aren't there better things to crave?]. What's amazing though, is that once Halloween is over, I can pass candy corn in any venue and have absolutely no desire for it. I mean zilch. You could even offer me some and I'd very easily so no thank you.

This year, however, things started out a tiny bit differently than previous years. This year I started buying my candy drug in September. I usually wait till at least the first week in October, but for some reason [I'll guess an emotional one] I allowed myself a small bag of Brach's candy corn. On the 4th day, when that last kernel was eaten, I contemplated the possibility that I had gotten them out of my system early.

NOT! About a week later, I arrived home to find a package from UPS on my porch. I opened it and there inside was a small bag of candy corn. Sooooo sweet!!! Not the corn, but my 12 year old daughter. Being the understanding, wonderful and nurturing person she is, she sent me a care package. To make a long story short, I OD'd on them the second day and had to head upstairs for a sugar-induced nap. During my afternoon siesta, my husband told my daughter to go hide the candy corn and to dole it out sparingly... and only if I begged. Humph!! I don't know at whom I'm angrier? My daughter for buying it, my husband for hiding it, or me for my lack of control over it.

Fortuitously [or not], I found the stash of candy corn. As I was sitting at my desk this afternoon answering emails and munching on my drug of choice, I dropped a few. Iggy, our adopted dog, knows that when something drops he has to wait for permission to eat it otherwise he would be eating buttons, staples, you name it. Well, you'll never believe what happened. The minute Iggy saw what had fallen, he lunged for those 3 yellow, orange and white tipped sweeties. I swear, we had a fist to paw fight over them.

As I sat there staring at my dog and three lost candy corn, it came to me in a flash: Oh my G-d, Iggy's previous owners had turned him into a candy corn addict!!! I smiled... it's nice to have a junkie buddy.

Quote of the Day: "The chains of habit are generally too small to be felt until they are too stong to be broken" Samuel Johnson

#64 Dairy Queen, and Then Some

For a number of reasons, yesterday wasn't a great day. First, I had too much to do, but all I really wanted to do was sit on the porch swing and read. Second, I walked into the corner store to get my post-power-walk coffee just as freshly baked [the aroma was to die for] bagels were being delivered. Third, there was an entry in my date book that read, Brunch-11:00. For the life of me, I couldn't figure out if this was a mistake or if I/we really had a brunch. Since I am a very organized person, I figured I wrote this in as a "maybe", but never confirmed it. Just in case, though, I called a few people, asked my husband and kids, and even called my neighbor on her cell when I saw her speeding out of her driveway at 10:45 to ask her if I was supposed to be where she was heading. Laughing, she said no. Alas, I just couldn't remember, ate one of those blasted bagels, and got on with my day.

I was heading back home after chauffeuring my son to his tennis lesson, my dog to the vet for a bath, and my daughter to her rehearsal when I started fantasizing about installing a port-a-potty and kitchenette in the car. I was really getting into the design when my cell phone rang. Hello, I said. On the other end was my friend Pam who asked, "Are you lost?". I stared out at the road thinking lost?, when I suddenly remembered what that 11:00 brunch entry was. Horrified at this faux pas, I pulled onto a side street, apologized profusely, and tried not to sound like the idiot I felt. It was Pam's 50th birthday brunch being hosted by her daughter, and I was supposed to be there with heels on and gift in hand. My bad! I'm bad! Just plain bad!

Those two paragraphs above lead up to this: We are neither alone nor original in how we deal with our small universe. Hear me out.

I'm upset about Pam, frustrated about all the driving hither and yon, and numb from standing in forever lines at 3 different supermarkets [Whole Foods, Trader Joes and Acme]. To me, this back and forth, in and out of the car is the most exhausting thing in the world. On my way to pick up my daughter, I decide that I would feel a whole lot better if I had a Dairy Queen vanilla cone with chocolate sprinkles. Yep. That's what would make me feel better. It's 5:00 PM, but what the hell -- I buy the cone -- I didn't really enjoy it.

I picked up my daughter and headed home. When we got home, I was truly in no mood to make dinner, but I had defrosted chicken and it needed to be cooked. While the chicken was doing its thing, I decide to do mine - improve my mood by munching on some mini chocolate donuts [PMS stash - although a bit old and stale, I still ate them]. After dinner, I answered emails and in response to a friend's question of how I'm doing, I write back about my day and the food I used to boost my spirits. This is what my friend [with the PhD in Psychology] wrote back:

I had Dairy Queen this week too - a chocolate cone with chocolate sprinkles. I found it very unsatisfying because I wanted a strong chocolate taste - so I immediately drove to 7 - 11. They have a chocolate brownie there that understands what chocolate means. I felt guilty about eating such bad food and thought perhaps I was PMSing, but I was wrong. The job of parenting is about endless giving, which becomes depleting, which is why we sometimes try to fill up again - with something, anything, that is for us - a private joy if you will.

Wow, two educated, healthy-eating, caring about our bodies, exercise freaks eating dairy queen and then some. It struck me that if she and I were doing this, there must have been hundreds [thousands?] of other men and women eating their "Dairy Queen" and then some. See what I mean? We're not alone...

Quote of the Day: "Do or do not. There is no try" Yoda

#63 Bobbie is Babbling

Singing The Calorie Blues

I was recently in NYC and realized that if I lived there, I might starve... or become very, very healthy. This realization had nothing to do with how much I walked, nor the prices at restaurants. This OMG moment happened at a corner deli when I noticed extra numbers next to the prices and realized that they were calories. It seems that restaurant chains [those with 3 or more eating establishments] are required to post the calories for the food they serve http://www.reuters.com/article/healthNews/idUSN1847047920080720720. Since I now know exactly how many calories are in a NY bagel [without butter] and a plain slice of pizza, I'm thinking of never allowing these foods to pass by my lips again. Yeah right!!

Born Round

Funny and thought provoking book about a guy [Frank Bruni, food critic] who tells his story about being born "round". This got me thinking about big babies. Some people are just born big, or big boned, but does their continued bigness have to do with the amount of food they eat? Does one thing "feed off" the other? My son was born big, almost 9 pounds. He was my chunky toddler, and I shopped in the husky departments until he had his growth spurt. He is now 5'10" and slim. Unlike Bruni though, my son's eating habits were that of a normal person... he stopped when he was full - like after eating a half a brownie. Bruni shares that even as a little kid, he would "scream for seconds". It makes me wonder: Are you born with the "big gene"? Are you big because you eat a lot? Do you eat a lot because you're big?

I know young kids who are very overweight, who crave food and sweets, and actually cry when they don't get enough food or can't get the food they really want. So, for all my food issues, I'm so happy that this one passed me by. Emotional eating is bad enough, but to have a physiological need that starts young, well, that's just a major bummer!

We Have No Chance

How can we not think about food when "it" is all around us. Just look at these sayings and see how ingrained foodisms are in our lives.

You are what you eat
Eat like there's no tomorrow
She drinks like a fish
Now that's hard to swallow
Hungry like the wolf
Nourishing our souls
Brain food
Food for thought
Thirst for knowledge
Hungry for adventure
Quench your desires

See what I mean? If there were as many sayings to do with sex as there are to do with food, well, uh, then, I would be thinking about other things besides food ... which would actually make my husband very happy. Perhaps my next babble will have a list of sayings that are sex driven. Hello out there -- I may need some help!

Who Knew?

In my freshman year, one of my professors said to the class, "everyone is beautiful". I sat there with my small mind thinking that we must be seeing different people. Over these many years though, I have learned differently. I now search out that type of beauty. I've learned that some people have a special type of beauty that others are blind to, but that are transformative to both that person and the viewer. Click on this link to be inspired, to see a life being changed, to see others transformed, to see the recognition that someone can really be "beautiful" when minutes before, it was hidden. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__Gs02ZmUmE

Quote of the Day: "The most common reason we stumble into the delusion of powerlessness is that we're afraid of what other people would do if we were to act as we wanted" Martha Beck (author)